Rabbi Konigsburg's Blog

This week’s parsha, Vayeira, begins with a curious detail. It says that God appeared to Abraham at Elonei Mamre (Genesis 18:1). The first word, Elonei, comes from the Hebrew word eilon which can either mean “plains” or it can mean “a tall tree,” specifically, the Mediterranean tree called the Terebinth. The second word, Mamre, is the name of a person who was allied with Abraham. In last week’s Torah portion, a refugee from the war of the five kings versus the four kings finds Abraham and offers him a report about his nephew Lot being captured in the war. At the time, Abraham was with his comrade Mamre who we learn is an Amorite (Genesis 14:13). In that same verse, we learn that Mamre has two brothers (or kinsman) Eshkol and Aner. These three are seen as associates of Abraham who went to battle with him to rescue Lot. Thus, our Parsha begins by telling us that Abraham was in the plains, or amongst the terebinths of Mamre, presumably in the vicinity of his buddies. But why would the Torah situate the following story of Parshat Vayeira with these details. This portion later tells the story of the angelic visitors that Abraham brings into his tent, who subsequently share the news that Sarah will give birth to a son in a year. And apparently, this moment of hospitality and divine portent happened while Abraham was in Mamre’s stomping grounds. 

Our tradition explains through a midrash found in Bereishit Rabba 42:8, why the Torah makes reference to Mamre.

Rabbi Azarya reports that Rabbi Yehuda taught in the name of Rabbi Simon: [why is he called Mamre?] It is because he was brazen-faced regarding Abraham [as Mamre means "strength.] When the Holy One blessed be He told Abraham to circumcise himself, he went and consulted with his three friends. Aner said to him: ‘You are already one hundred years old and you are going to bring pain upon yourself?’ Eshkol said to him: ‘What, are you going to put an end to yourself in the midst of your enemies?’ Mamre said to him: ‘[This is] your God who stood by you [during your ordeal] in the fiery furnace, and during [your war with] the kings, and during the famine, and in this matter that He has said to you, to circumcise yourself, you do not heed Him?’ The Holy One blessed be He said to him: ‘You gave him counsel to circumcise himself; by your life, I will not appear to him in Aner’s palace, nor in Eshkol’s palace, but only in your palace.’ That is what is written: “The Lord appeared to him in the palace of Mamre” (Genesis 18:1).

In other words, of all of Abraham’s associates, Mamre was the one who steered Abraham righteously and encouraged him on the noble path. 

Like Abraham, there are many people in our lives whose company we seek. People who we play, live, or work with. A question this midrash begs us to consider is, are these people positive influences in our lives? Do these people bring out the best in us and push us towards our fullest potential? In Abraham’s case, it's not so clear that Aner and Eshkol were bad actors. After all, Abraham was old, and would weaken himself at a critical moment, and they seemingly were interested in Abrham’s wellbeing. However, sometimes the advice that we need to hear is not the advice that we want to hear. Having people in our lives like Mamre, who can break us out of our echo chambers, is important. This Shabbat, as we read about Abraham’s hospitality with the angels in the land of Mamre, let us reflect on the people who influence our own actions and thinking, and may we all be blessed to have friends like Mamre in our lives.

Shabbat Shalom