"Passing Life’s Tests"

Rosh Hashanah 5766, First Day

Rabbi Joshua Heller
Congregation B’nai Torah
rabbi@bnaitorah.org

A classic story: Four upperclassmen from Harvard go to Yale for a weekend of revelry and conjugating- conjugating Latin verbs, that is. They oversleep, and are late getting back to campus, missing the final exam in their chemistry class. They come up with a brilliant excuse, and come to the professor “We had a flat tire. “ The curmugeonly professor responds kindly, “Don’t worry, you can take a make up tomorrow, though of course it will be a different test.” When they receive the test, they expect a question on oxidation/reduction, or molar vs. molal.

There’s just one question: “Which tire was it?”

We place a great deal of stock in tests. From the time you start school, and throughout life, you are tested constantly. From the time you are born Michael Wolfson slaps you on the butt, you are given an Apgar score. Then tests determine where we go to high school college, graduate school. Even how we rank our states schools. Georgia is up to #49th this year.

The greatest tests don't involve #2 pencils or bluebooks- they are the tests of life. So often, I encounter people who face profound struggles and troubles in life- death, illness, family difficulties, economic uncertainty. They will say, with a deep and abiding faith "God is testing me, but I'm up to it." Or they may challenge- “why is God testing me?” We also recognize that success, affluence, can be a test as well.

Today, I'd like to expand on a concept that I've been struggling with- it's been a thread that has carried through teaching, and even my message in the Atlanta Jewish times this year. What are life's greatest tests? How do we know if we've passed? Moreover, what kind of God needs to test us? Doesn't God already know what we are made of?

Two of the most powerful hurricanes strike within three weeks and 300 miles of each other, with markedly different results. Was that a test? Does that mean that the people of Lake Charles were the "control" group?

Earlier this summer, I had a series of 4 "bummer" sermons the situation in Israel, outsourcing, the situation in Israel again, and death. After the last one- Wendy said to me "you need a vacation- we're going to Las Vegas with my in-laws." That's my Kol Nidre sermon.

In my death sermon, I talked about a colleague, a colleague who has become my friend, whose very young grandchild died very tragically. I said that I had not gone to the funeral, small children of my own. How could I bear to go?

A few weeks later, I got a call from a friend to come over to Northside- a young couple, friends of theirs, whose nine-month baby was on life support were watching her slip away, and asked if I could come over. I did everything I was supposed to do. I prayed, I consulted, I consoled. The baby died, and I did what was asked of me. It was a beautiful, sunny day. It was a gorgeous, Georgia summer day, a tall oak cast a gentle shadow. It was a very small box.

Was God testing the child? Was God testing those parents? Did that child suffer and die so God could see what they were made of? Do I have the audacity to ask whether God was testing me- calling my bluff?

These questions are particularly serious for us at this season of the year. We believe that God cares about our behavior, our reactions to life. Our liturgy speaks of God examining each one of us. Like soldiers in formation, like sheep in a flock, we are assessed. At least once a year, we are judged on our behavior.

This is distinct from some religions feel that the way we are judged in life. They’d say that life is like a hotel- at the end of your stay, as you check out, so to speak, there is a reckoning. You are presented with a long, itemized list of all your charges. These are the phone calls you made. This is what you took from the minibar. 50 cents for the "free" newspaper. $12 a day for valet parking. $126 dollars for in-room movies.

Imagine how that relates to our lives- you might have unlimited night and weekend minutes on your cellphone, but you will be taken to task for all the times that you communicated in harmful ways. The dinner may be cheap, but you still are responsible for everything that you ate that you shouldn't. All of the concern that you paid to your material possessions, as opposed to what’s important. Even if your hotel bill doesn't list the names the of the in-room movies, you'd imagine God knows what we've rented.

The Jewish approach is more a la carte. At each stage, at each step along the way, we are tested and assessed. At the very least, we are assessed once a year. The Talmud, (Rosh Hashanah 16a) teaches:
Rabbi Meir says we are judged on Rosh Hashanah, and the decree is finalized on Yom Kippur. Rabbi Yehudah says: we are judged at different seasons for different things- Sukkot for water, Passover for grain, and so on.

Rabbi Yose goes further- he says that a man is judged every day.
Rabbi Nathan takes it ot the extreme: he says that man is judged every hour.

I can understand that God wants us to behave in a certain way, and judges us. But why would God need to entrap us, why would God need TEST us, does God need to throw things our way to see how we respond? After all, if God knows everything, what could God learn from the results?

When confronted with life's most challenging questions, I look to the Torah. Tomorrow, we will read the story of the binding of Isaac- "Vadonai Nisah et Avraham" God tested Abraham. We are meant to understand that the binding of Isaac- God's command to Abraham to take his son, his only son, and offer him on the altar, is a test. At the last moment, the angel stays Abraham's hand, and says Ata Yadati- now I know that you truly have faith.

The commentators all struggle with the question of why God would need to test someone. If God knows everything, God knows how things will turn out. I’ll give you a sample of answers: Some say that it's not that God needs to know, but rather that God needs to let others know- God needs us to go through our paces so he can prove our faith to others, or even to prove to US that our faith is true. Another suggests that even if one knows something in the abstract, it is not the same as seeing it demonstrated. Another scholar says that the whole root is misunderstood “Nisah” doesn’t mean to test, it means to raise up.” And indeed, the best tests are the ones where we learn something.

Our tradition, starting with the Mishnah in chapter 5 of Pirkei Avot, understands this episode as the culmination of a series of 10 tests. Though sages agree that there were 10, they disagree as to what they were. Let me share with you a few:

Exile, as God said: Lech Lecha, "leave your land and your birthplace."- Leaving what is familiar, setting out into the unknown is a test. The famine in the land of Canaan, forcing Abraham to leave the land even after he had been promised that that would be his home. Financial hardship is a test. Even more so is breaking of trust, breaking of a promise I think about the Jews of Gaza, who thought that that land would be their homes. His battle with the four kings- conflict on the world stage. His taking Hagar as a concubine when he gave up on having a son with Sarah- entering into new relationships is stressful. Conversely, sending away Hagar- leaving relationships is stressful.

Circumcision: enough said.

Today's Torah reading- sending Ishmael away- was a test as well. Isaac is born, and Sarah says- “you must cast out, be rid of your son Ishmael.” Abraham is distressed "vayera hadavar" God tells him "do what Sarah asks." Thus "yes dear" was invented. Abraham arises early in the morning, Gives them a loaf of bread and a jug of water. Is that really enough to go wandering in the desert? Eventually, through divine intervention, Ishmael is saved, and he becomes a great and mighty nation himself.

Abraham is tested- he's been asked to do something onerous- give up his son. After some regret, he does so.

Reading this morning's Torah reading is really the key to understanding tomorrow's, the story of the binding of Isaac

Today- when he is asked to send away Ishmael, Abraham complains. Tomorrow, at least the plain sense of the text is that he does so without question. There is only one side of the conversation- God’s, but the Midrash unpacks the verse.

God commands "Your son, your only son, whom you love, Isaac." Fills in "Your son- but I have two sons. Your only son- this one is only to his mother, this one is only to his.

Whom you love- I love them both. Isaac. Ultimately, his response is the same- he arises early saddles up his ass and goes off to send his child into danger.

Abraham is given essentially the same test twice- will you take your beloved son, and endanger him for the divine command? What do we take away from these stories?

The first key point is that the text does not view these as tests of Isaac or Ishmael. We, with the benefit of hindsight, have read the little message at the end of the movie that reassures us "no children were harmed in the making of this film" but isn't this a test for them?

I’ll cite a scene from an obscure, but culturally significant movie- “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.” The high school prom is a scene of mayhem- vampires have gone on a rampage and eaten many of the students. The film closes with the principal saying "I think everyone learned a valuable lesson about safety here today. Except for the dead ones, that is. Well, they learned it, but they didn’t have a chance to implement it.”

Suffering that crushes you has no meaning as a test. Look at the book of Job- Job undergoes every horrible misfortune possible. He loses his flocks, he loses his family, he is struck with horrible disease, all so that God can test his faith. The sages say- (Talmud Bavli, Bava Batra 16a) that Job never was.

Or look at Berachot 5b- it tells stories of sages striken with every type of misfortune. They are asked: “do you appreciate your suffering?” They respond “neither them, nor their reward.”

I don't believe that God tests us through our own personal suffering. Sometimes it may be "karma" something we have coming to us, or a response to something. Sometimes perhaps it is a roll of the dice. But I can't believe that God is actually like a kid with a magnifying glass and an anthill.

Besides - A test implies personal choice- you can pick answer A or B, one is right, one is wrong. When we are struck by tragedy, we can choose our disposition, but rarely the outcome. We are no different from Isaac on the altar. Judaism assesses us, ultimately on actions, not attitude. Make no mistake, there is great merit in approaching every trouble with a sense of purpose, of optimism. "What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger" but it is only in situations where we are able to respond that we can be held responsible.

And so, what are the tests- I believe that the test of Abraham, and of life, is whether we are sensitive to the presence of evil in the world around us- does Abraham have the sensitivity to say- “you know what, God, I appreciate what you are asking, but this is as far as I go.” Contrast this story with the story of Sodom. He's willing to bargain for 50 evil people, even down to 10, but not for his own son. He comes close with Ishmael. With Isaac, the test is not whether he will offer up his son- for indeed, in his day child sacrifice was a common thing. The question is- when God comes back to him: will he stop?

The scene is 1993, the California state Bar, in the Pasadena convention center. One of the 500 test-takers had an epileptic seizure and stopped breathing. What’s one less lawyer? Out of 500, 5 students stopped their test. It was only after a huge outcry that the State Bar Association agreed that that section of the test would not be counted against them. 2 of the 5 passed the bar. Time is short, so insert your favorite "I hate lawyers" joke here. But the question remains- who would you want as your lawyer, who would you want as your neighbor, your spouse? When do you stop and help?

Even more importantly, we can learn from Abraham's life, and the 10 tests that he faced, that our most critical tests are repeated. Trials, like the proverbial postman, always ring twice.

To take an example that I began with: in the past few months, we saw two of the most fierce hurricanes on record pass within 300 miles of each other. In one case, there was astonishing loss of life and property. In the other, the damage was extensive- Rita will end up being one of the 10 most expensive storms on record, but fatalities were few. I could respond cynically in any number of ways, and indeed on other occasions, I have spoken about other Jewish questions to be asked. But for our purposes here today, I will note that the difference in the two storms is that we learned lessons, we responded differently we were prepared. We had a second chance, and we got it right. Ultimately, the most important test of Katrina is not how those who survived it will go on will their lives. They face important questions- how do we rebuild our lives? Do we go back or do we stay where we are? But those are, believe it or not, extra credit. The most important questions are posed to us- what will we do, long after this has dropped out of the media, to make sure that we care for those who take the longest to recover. What will we do on a national level to make sure that his doesn't happen again? How will demand changes of policy to ensure that our own actions, by contributing to erosion and global climate change, don't exacerbate the situation in years to come?

We are faced with many challenges in life- with strange and new situations, with broken promises, with family strife, with financial hardship. Life's greatest tests, however, are not how we respond to our own tzuris, but whether we can see the troubles of others as our own.

We are contstantly given new opportunities to respond.
We are, at least sometimes, bound to fail, for we are frail.
We can hope for success, for we have boundless capability
We can pray for guidance, and even if we do not receive material assistance, help and aid for those who for we believe that God attends all prayers.

Life is full of tests and trials. Fortunately, there's a study guide that you are welcome to bring with you, and the most important tests are open book. Let's start studying before the final exam.